Storm the Train Review

Trains!? A pirate on a train, what were you thinkin’. Ooohhh, good ol’ Calypso must be playing her tricks again on me ears. Aye, she does that quite a bit, ya know. Remember this fella’, never ever mention trains around pirates or ya may soon find your head missin’ an ear by way of a sharp cutlass swipe. And that goes double when ya mix “storm” and “train” such as what this new app you have been mumblin’ about since we docked. Oh alrighty, me gets it now, the app’s name is “Storm the Train”. If you had blurted that out sooner, I wouldn’t have lost it. So, what is this “Storm the Train” about anyways?

Action-Packed Killing

Storm the Train is a classic, endless game packed with action, murder, and extreme mayhem. And, aye, you guessed it right, the game takes place on a locomotive (duh!). This locomotive seems to be going nowhere but you seem to moving forward looking for more douchebags to kill, maim, and shoot. The douchebags consist of zombies, ninjas, and single-minded robots whose main goal is to separate your head from your body. Fortunately, you are geared to withstand those obstacles and reach your goal, except that there really is no goal other than killing as many douchebags as you can. So, aye, the whole murder and extreme mayhem seems to be a fitting secondary title for this app.

Characters, Controls, and Weapons

The game provides you with three characters to choose from. Each one has special skills, nifty skins, and varying health stats. You can switch between characters in game like you would socks, which becomes rather useful when the current character you are controlling comes dangerously low in the health department.

The game controls are quite straightforward and simple. You can either go forward or run back depending on the situation by just tapping on the arrow keys at the bottom of the screen. Expect to be running back a lot, especially when the number of zombies, robots, and those blasted ninjas overwhelm you. Run back, regroup, and begin the massacre. Aside from running back and forth, you can jump by tapping the upward arrow.

With regards to weaponry, Storm the Train has a ton of weapons to choose from. So, the murder and killing never really grows old. You will especially love what happens when the mayhem meter, which you can find on the left side, gets full. Aye, prepare yourself for a random weapon of mass destruction, which can literally clear the area for you of enemies. Most players find the Circular Death Weapon one of the most interesting super weapons because the player can actually ride on it as the devastation around him occurs. Cool, right?

Coins

Any mobile app or game will never be complete without some sort of monetary reward system. Through the course of your gameplay on Storm the Train, you will, like oh so many games before it, come across coins you can collect. These coins can be traded in for power ups and other upgrades. Since these games can be tedious to collect, it is highly recommended to save them for character upgrades as you will want to permanently boost the health stats of your characters every which way you can. Of course, if you don’t like that route, you can always splurge on character skins if you feel that a little more character customization will make this game more enjoyable for you. Don’t worry, if you run out of coins, you can always break the bank and buy coins in exchange for your hard-earned dough. Seems a waste, but hey, whatever floats your boat.

Graphics

Smooth and old school. Not too old, though. In other words, the game touts classic arcade graphics, which won’t burn your iPad or iPhone white hot. On either device, there is very little lag and everything seems to be fluid. And with gameplay that demands continuous tapping and killing, fluid graphics is exactly what you need.

Conclusion

Topnotch gameplay, fluid graphics, and no specific goal other than killing – aye, this seems to be the dream app for every action-craving dude. So, if you are a man with a lot of testosterone to burn, drop this app onto your iPad and start tapping away.